Blond Beard

I went to the Greek Festival tonight, and I talked to a bum outside of the place before I went in.

"That is a beautiful beard," he said to me. "You look like Thor."

I immediately replied, "Thanks!" I was pretty surprised, but obviously flattered. It's not very often that I get referred to as beautiful.

"I like Thor," was the last thing that the man said to me, but as I walked away, I heard him say to the people that walked by behind me, "Watch out for Thor!"

What if we were cavemen?

Or if we lived on another planet, maybe?

And what if there were giant, flesh-eating monsters that prowled at night, and our only defense against them was to hide in our caves until daylight?

What if, instead of getting your girlfriend home by curfew, you had to get her home before sundown so that the man-eaters wouldn't devour the both of you?

What if, instead of dirty looks from your neighbor, the consequence for staying a few minutes later than you planned was that you'd have to fight your way past a giant reptile that would bite your arms off just to get you to stop poking it with your spear?


I think that'd be weird.

Attacked by Dogs

There's a park by my work that I like to go to when I run, mostly because it's big and pretty well shaded by the trees. And no, I haven't lost any weight yet (though hopefully I've at least stopped getting fatter). That's not really the point.

I don't think I had a problem with dogs before my mission. That's because in the United States, people keep their dogs in their yards or on leashes, so dogs don't just roam the streets looking for people to bite. In Chile it's different, and not just because the people let their dogs do whatever the want, but because there are too many dogs. I'm sure that's related to the lack of "fixing" (or the lack of money to do so?), but whatever it is, there are stray dogs everywhere, and they're not all very nice. So when I was there, I kind of learned to be cautious about dogs, because you never know which ones are going to decide to come after you.

Despite the odds and several attempts, I was never bitten on mission. I'm sure that was mostly due to the backup I received (both of the celestial nature and that of my companion's foot).

Where was I?

I had actually finished running yesterday and I was just walking back to my car when I passed two smallish dogs laying on the grass. (I only know a few breeds, so I can't say what kinds of dogs they were, though I know a few kinds that they weren't.) I don't know how long the dogs had been sitting there or how many people had walked past them before me. I don't know what it was about me that they didn't like, unless they could just tell that I was wary of them and decided to take advantage of that. Whatever it was they both jumped up suddenly and ran towards me barking.

I kind of panicked. At first I jumped back startled and started to run, but the smaller of the two dogs came in for bite. I didn't even think about it, but I kind of instinctively gave it a kick to the jaw. I wish that would have taught it a lesson, but they kept coming, so I just started running away from them.

I'm sure I ran way faster right then than I had during the whole of my workout, but all of the same I didn't get very far before realizing that I couldn't outrun the dogs, so I turned around to face them. For some reason I thought about something I'd read on a sign post in Colorado about mountain lions, and so I stuck my arms out to make myself look big and yelled nonsense sounds at the dogs. They both stopped, but didn't retreat. I wasn't very far from my car, but any time I started to move towards it the dogs would think I was retreating myself, and get courage to come at me again. When they did this the first time I tried kicking again, but I realized that I couldn't swing at one without being vulnerable to the other. So I went back to just acting tough, and there we stood in a deadlock.

I could see people coming around the park on the path, so I waited so that they could help me when they got close. When they actually showed up, though, they just strolled past and the dogs left them completely alone. Three sets of people walked by, and instead of helping me out they just said how cute my dogs were. I was too embarrassed to admit that I was afraid of them and that I needed some help, so I just let them go by.

I finally got away because a car drove by and I managed to have it separate me from the dogs, and the I got back to my car. I felt really shaken up, even though I hadn't been hurt.


Somehow this turned into a really long post, but I figure that embarrassing things make good stories. Enjoy.

Burger Supreme

The great equalizer: Burger Supreme. Everyone from Provo probably knows it, and for me it was a favorite and the first of these Greek burger places that I was really familiar with. So, how does it stack up?

Pastrami Burger: 8
Tomato, lettuce like the normal toppings, but with a tiny bit of (what I think is) the fry sauce and a slice of american cheese. The truth is that the american cheese doesn't go as well with the burger as the swiss did at Mad Greek, and it's almost too much.
The killer of this burger, though, is the pastrami. It's a subtle difference, such that it took me a minute to realize what it is, but the pastrami on this burger takes more like corned beef than normal pastrami, so it has a really unique flavor that I think makes the burger.
(And as a side note, I looked up pastrami and corned beef, and they're almost the same meat, except that pastrami is smoked and peppered. So, maybe BS just doesn't smoke their pastrami, and that's how they get the unique hybrid flavor. That's just a theory, of course.)
I think this is still the best pastrami burger I've had. If it had swiss instead of american cheese, it might be unbeatable.

Gyro: 8
The first thing I noticed about the gyro at BS is just how juicy the meat is. The slices are thick, juicy, and flavorful. Can I say juicy one more time? The meat was great.
The cucumber sauce was creamy, but not with the same extraordinary richness that Mad Greek had. It was, however, full of chopped cucumber, onion and tomato. The cucumber really added a freshness to it.
The oil, however, was a noticeable downside. While Mad Greek's oil has a unique and pleasant flavor, Burger Supreme's seems like normal animal/vegetable fat, so the presence of the oil kind of weighs the gyro down and makes it seem heavier and greasier than it needs to be.

French Fries: 7
The fries are very greasy at BS, but not so much that it makes them soft or soggy. On the contrary, they were fresh and very crispy, which in my opinion, makes them great. (And from experience from visiting this place many times when I lived in Provo, I can say that they're consistently this way.)

Fry Sauce: 7
The fry sauce is ketchup and mayo, like usual (and I don't think it's any weird kind of mayo). It does have a little bit higher content of mayo than ketchup (which I like, but I realize that not everyone does).

Conclusion
The thing Burger Supreme does best is meat. The meats are flavorful and juicy. (I know I've said that too much, but it really is true.) While the trimmings (like sauces and cheeses) are consistently good, they're not anything extraordinary, either.

Mad Greek

Sorry, I know it's been awhile, and I'm sure everyone's been going hungry waiting for me to tell them where to eat.

So, Mad Greek. I have to admit that I kind of judged it by it's name, and I thought it was going to be some cheap trendy kind of place. The sign outside of the location I went to () even says "Ze Best Greek". (That's at Mad Greek Too, and yes, it is a chain, though there's only 5 of them, so it's still just a local chain.) Though, maybe I should have realized they don't know how to be trendy since they made their slogan bigger than their name on the sign.

This is all beside the point. The food's what's important here.

Pastrami burger: 7
Tomato, shredded lettuce, and thick lean slices of pastrami. Not high on quantity like at Crown Burger, but the pastrami was leaner, thicker, and peppered. Nothing amazing or groundbreaking there, but it definitely met expectations. The novelty with the pastrami burger at Mad Greek is the thick slice of swiss cheese with which they topped the burger. That was a great touch, and it really made all the difference.

Gyro: 9
It's a high score, I know, but I really think this is going to end up being the best one. I've tried it several times, partly just so I could have a good description (but partly, too, just because it's so good).
The pita was lightly toasted (not fried). It had very little tomato and onion, cut into small strips, and mixed in with the meat (instead of sitting in a pile on top). The meat uses a mixture of beef and lamb, and it's very tender. Not as high quantity as Crown Burger, but definitely tender and well-seasoned. The oil on it has this really subtle sweetness to it. It's really unique, but once noticed, it's worth reveling in.
And the sauce. Oh, man. The sauce was really thick and creamy (like if it had gotten any thicker or creamy it would have been cheese instead of a milk-based sauce), with a cucumber flavor that's just mild enough to be noticably cucumber without being strong enough to overpower the flavor of the meat. The best sauce I've had.

French Fries: 7
The french fries were very potato-flavored (which I think is good, seeing as they're made of potatos), and very lightly fried (which may be good if you're not as fat as me and don't need that much grease), and heavily salted (which is good, and I don't have any qualifier for that). They were fried enough to be crisp on the outside, but not to be greasy or really crunchy. If you don't like greasy fries, then these might be the best you'll find.

Fry Sauce: 8
Mayo and ketchup, like normal; at least at first glance. More mayo than ketchup, and the mayo was the thick, pasty stuff that I've only had in Chile or from my grandma's Dutch import store. That kind of mayo is made for french fries, and it really made the fry sauce better.

Conclusion:
Mad Greek was dang good. Don't discount it because of the name or the silly buildings. All the food was good, and the gyro was fantastic. I'm skeptical if I'll be able to find one to beat it.