Swine Flu Cured

I think I know how to cure swine flu. I think I remember the news saying that you can't sick from eating pig meat products. That's good news. We're entirely safe eating pork, bacon, ham, etc. All we need to do is eat all of the pigs, and soon the disease will be no more. So, for the sake of humanity's future, eat more bacon.

Not a turn-friendly zone

What does San Francisco have against left turns? It seems like every street we'd cross while we were there prohibited left-hand turns. I understand the ones that are one-way streets, and I appreciate the sign helping me not get killed by an oncoming bus. But what about all of the other streets? What's their excuse? It's like this city just has something against ambi-turners. You'd think that a city that's so accepting of people swinging both ways would be more tolerant of those of us who like to turn both ways.

Star Trek censorship

Do you think in the Clean Flicks' version of Star Trek they change his name to William Crappedner?